Tiniest Toad in the World

So last night the husband and I were out for a walk with our giant dog because if we don't exercise him, he is an asshole and breathes in our faces when we lie on the couch and squeaks his squeaker toy really loud during movies and crap. So we let him run around these woods by our house and now that the foliage is really tall he loves hopping through it like a gazelle whilst grabbing large chucks of grass in his mouth and eating it which is really annoying since this either makes him puke or shit weird.

ANYWAYS

On the way back home, I spotted something that looked like a cricket hopping on the side of the road. I didn't have my contacts in, and am still waiting for my new glasses---hurry the F up Spectacle Shoppe, your added e is already annoying enough without lying to me about my glasses being ready in a day--so I bent down to see what a cricket was doing in the road since they usually prefer to hide in places like my grandmas basement or in a dusty part of your garage.

And to my great joy and amazement, I discovered that this creature hopping on the side of the road, was not in fact an insect, but the worlds tiniest baby toad. Now, I used to be lucky enough to have a cabin to go to as a child, so I can safely say I have a pretty extensive knowledge on things like baby toads and baby turtles and whathaveyou since I used to collect them by the bucketfuls back in the 80s. And I have never seen a toad this small. Ever. He was so small, I couldn't pick him up with my fingers for fear of squashing his delicate little insides. Because my husband is an engineer, he figured out that allowing the toad to hop onto a small leaf, and then picking up said leaf would be the safest way for us to get a closer look at this beast, as I sat there struggling with the frustration of needing to hold this thing, and not being able to pick it up without smooshing it to death. **Side Note**There is a reason some people are born with logical thinking brains, and that reason is to help the emotional thinking beings like me figure out ways to pick up a baby toad without killing it. Because if I wasn't able to hold this thing, I would have freaked the F out.

After all of these words, I'm sure you are hoping for a picture. And thanks to the magic of technology, I do have a decent photo to show you. The appendage you see in the picture is the tip of my thumb. I just measured my thumbnail, and it is 3 centimeters long to give you some perspective on the size of this guy.

So yes. There you have it. The Worlds Tiniest Toad. We only held him long enough to take this picture, and then let him go back on his merry way. I realize there is a good chance that this small of a creature might not survive to adulthood, and later on in the evening we even discussed how much money it would have taken for one of us to eat him---Me--couldn't do. For any amount of money. You can not kill something that cute. Its like worse than kicking a puppy. Husband--10 bucks---but I thought it was cool to see something that small that actually has a tiny brain and heart and skeleton and nervous system and junk. I am kind of a science dork at heart along with liking fantasy novels. Just in case you forget, I am the coolest.

So yes. Have a lovely weekend and go outside sometime in the next few days and appreciate nature for once you assholes. 

~Maria