I began participating on Twitter over a year ago even though I swore that I would never be involved in something so ridiculous. The idea of broadcasting your every move in 130 characters or less did not appeal to me. I dont even care what Im doing 90% of the time, why would anyone else? But then I learned that Twitter is fun to fuck around on with your homies and to get real time news updates, but that overall, the real point of it is to creep on the famous and semifamous.
And because of twitter Ive found myself in better connection with whats going on around the globe, and I get to see pics of Amanda Bynes tweerking in her mirror after snorting dishwasher flakes, and most of all, twitter has helped me come to the conclusion that if I ever see Rob Delaney in person Im going to run up and hug him while either humping his leg or peeing on his shoe.
Becoming part of the twitter community means Im also exposed to the completely asinine shit that makes up 99.9% of everything else there. And amidst all of the dumbfuckery, the spelling mistakes, grammar errors, boob selfies, and food pics, there is one thing that continues to baffle me. The large number of people who use twitter to say really terrible hateful mean shit to someone that if they met in real life they'd either ask for a picture with or would be too starstruck to speak.
Example:
Why does anyone find it socially acceptable to call this woman a whore--no matter how much of a waste of space she may be-- when she posts a picture of her pre Kan-baby self in a silver bikini? It confuses the hell out of me. You are literally replying to her tweet "@kimkardashian DIE". You have a picture of yourself and people you know know who you are and can read your tweets and can see that you are being a giant asshole for no reason. Did Kim come and make a sex tape with your husband? Did she tell you you looked fat in your prom dress? Did she shit in your refrigerator and ruin your Benihana leftovers? She didnt? Then what is your deal? You have nothing better to do with your one precious life than to call someone who doesnt even know you exist a slut via the internet? Cool. Good for you. Lets be friends.
I've become mentally exhausted with the anonymity of online being an excuse for people to be dickheads without repercussions. You cant go up to someone in real life sitting on a park bench doing their thing and yell "SLUT!!" at them without there being some kind of reaction from them or the people around you, hopefully violent in nature to some part of your face. You shouldnt be able to do it online either.
I dont think that celebrities and other famous persons necessarily even see 1/10th of the things tweeted at them, but if I were famous and occasionally saw that the first comment to a picture I was willing to share with the world was "DIE WHORE" I think it may kind of hurt my insides a little bit. And then to see that there isnt just one person being an asshole, but lots and lots, well, I think that shit adds up. All that negativity has to go somewhere. My hypothesis is as follows:
ASSHATS OF THE INTERNET: Your negative hate speech is collectively bringing down the emotional intelligence of our species and you are personally responsible for the reversal of evolution. You are the reason aliens are going to take us all out instead of inviting us to travel through their advanced worm hole technology to their super cool planets made of glitter and candybeans. Its your fault. Because aliens with advanced technologies arent stupid and why the fuck would they invite such juvenile hateful creatures to come swim in their glitterponds and travel the universe with them? They wouldnt. So fuck you for making the world a worse off place and for ruining our chance at interstellar travel.
The world is hard enough as it is without all of you shitting in the kool aid to boot. So knock it off. The internet is this really amazing alternate reality where we have the ability to communicate instantly with people around the world. Our great great grandparents had to wait months to get their out of state BFFs reaction to them accidentally knocking over the milk bucket "lol omg smdh!!" so you should be on your fucking knees worshiping the technology gods for your ability to communicate in such a quick fashion. Not wasting everyones time saying hateful shit while you are sipping your Jamba Juice in between classes. Use what you are given wisely. Or Im going to take your smartphone and put it in my blender.
