I have gone back and forth about writing something or not. Why add my opinion to the multitude? Why make enemies? Why cause more conflict? Why add to the drama? Because after everything Ive heard and read and been told, I have to say something. Because when shit hits the fan, I have to take a break from looking at the funny side of life and get real for a moment. If you don't want to read it, don't. Its that simple.
My goal with this post is to get to the barest of the bare bones in the hopes that I can adequately express why I am so emotionally destroyed right now. Think of this situation as a living thing. It has skin and hair and teeth and nails and organs and veins and blood and muscle. All of those parts are equivalent to the basic facts of the case, individual state laws, witness testimony, 911 tapes, past behaviors, the verdict, etc. These parts are the ones that we as observers love to dissect, endlessly going over and over. Pulling them apart, putting them back together, reorganizing, reshaping, remolding, until we have recreated the event into something we can recognize as making sense in our own minds. The shape and texture of this event are unique to the person who formed them, meaning even if we both go through all the details and both come up with an event that looks like a purple elephant, your purple elephant is not going to look the same as my purple elephant. Where the real tension and anger and devastation occurs is when we both look at this situation, and I end up with a purple elephant while you end up with a green alligator.
This is where the bones come into play and where I'm finally going to stop speaking in metaphors. The skeleton of the Zimmerman/Martin case is this: an unarmed 17 year old black child was shot to death while walking home from the store at night by an armed adult male who was told twice by a 911 operator to not engage the child and that the police were on the way. That's it. That's literally all you need to know. As a member of this thing called humanity, that in and of itself should make you scream or weep.
The argument I keep hearing over and over incessantly like a gnat buzzing around my head is that "if Trayvon were a nice, well mannered kid, none of this would have ever happened. If hes wasn't some thug wanna be, he wouldn't have started a physical fight with Zimmerman and Zimmerman wouldn't have had to shoot him." He should have done his little dance "yes sir no sir, how can I help you sir" and Zimmerman, being the vigilante neighborhood watchman of the year would have given him a stern talking to about not walking around at night looking so black, and then would have graciously let him continue on his way.
Ive also heard, "Trayvon was a bad person- he smoked, he drank, he fought, he wore baggy clothes, he punched a bus driver" as if being a teen and making stupid decisions somehow invalidates your life.
"Act like a thug, look like a thug, get treated like a thug"
"If you want to be treated professionally, dress professionally. He didn't, so he got what was coming to him"
"Perhaps blacks should do more to do more and better themselves instead of killing each other and living the thug life"
"One black kid gets shot by a Mexican its racist, but NO one says anything about 3 black kids that beat a white girl to death. Its sad"
The list goes on. It grows like some kind of parasitic tapeworm feasting on the hateful thoughts and misunderstood rationalizations of the internet. And because of blessed anonymity, not one of these people will ever have to look into the faces of Trayvon's parents and tell them why they think its ok that their son is dead. Because that's what you are saying when you defend a murderer. That you believe the life he chose to take wasn't worth it anyways, so who cares really? Self defense. He had no choice. He was being beaten, his head pummeled into the concrete. He had to shoot.
George Zimmerman made the choice that resulted in the death of Trayvon Martin the minute he ignored 2 warnings to not engage him and wait for the police. That's it. Truly. There was a crossroads, and Zimmerman took the path that made him feel something. He wanted something to happen, he wanted to be part of the action, to feel like the hero. He didn't bargain on the suspicious looking black kid resisting. Why would he suspect that? Zimmerman was the adult. He was the neighborhood watchman. He had the gun. He had the power. But Trayvon didn't see it that way.
I think the real reason people are so upset about this is because Trayvon fought back. He didn't run over to Zimmerman with his tail between his legs, begging for forgiveness for being young and black and male on a lonely street at night. He said Fuck You Man, I am who I am, I'm walking home, do something about it. That is what society fears. The fact that a young black male has the power to stand up for himself. I don't advocate for violence, that's not my point. I'm saying that the real fear lies in any trampled down person realizing their own power and strength in the face of their oppressors.
I hope Trayvon's parents can eventually find peace.
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
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